Road Sloths

Fast drivers can be a nuisance on public roads (if so then I'm a big nuisance). However the unusually speedy (not to mention dangerous) drivers are quite uncommon. There is however another breed of drivers with an uncanny ability to drive exceptionally slow. Although they do not directly cause turmoil on the road, if met by an impatient man behind the wheel of the car in their rear view mirror, it could be catastrophic.

       Worst case scenario:

"As the impatient driver drives along the fast lane, he is forced to slam on the brakes because dead ahead is what seems to be a stalled car! His initial reaction of panic is taken over by rage as he realizes the car ahead is actually moving at a snails pace. Any slower, the car ahead might start moving backwards. With the furious driver's mind taken over by rage, brains the size of a golfball and balls the size of mars,  he changes lanes without looking out to overtake the slothful driver not realizing a motorcyclist had been in the blind spot of his mirror. CRASH!!"

..... need I say more? The lethargic ignorant driver caused the life of a motorist. The reason? Driving too slow in the fast lane! Come on slow coaches the slow lane is constructed for a reason... YOU! And this is NOT America where slow drivers keep to their right!


-r a v i n d-

The Malaysian public transportation system: the very reason why we need our own cars.

Before I start my onslaught on the Malaysian system of public transportation would want to firstly say that my comments are mostly directed at the KTM(Kereta Api Tanah Melayu) or as some would call it Kereta api Tak Tahu Masa and secondly I would like to invite anyone who thinks that my post is too brutal or that I am overdoing it with my comments to try and take the the train at peek hours from any of stations such as KL Sentral, KL, Bank Negara headed towards any destination for that matter and prove me wrong.




Well first of all, ask any person who frequently takes the train and they would tell you that the piece of shit has no sense of punctuality. Waiting for two hours which is most likely UN heard of in countries like Japan and Singapore is an everyday occurrence in the Malaysian front. The amount of classes that I have missed thanks to this excellent network of morons guiding trains around in the past few years is quite a few. Well how about those who are working?? How many times are you gona be able to tell your superior that you are late due to the train service before he starts thinking that you trying to pull one over his head??



Yesterday I was rushing home after class to due to the fact that I was supposed to send a friend to the airport for a flight that was leaving at 10:30pm.My class finished at 5:30pm and I was in the station by 5:45pm. Well the train only came at 6:45pm and yes I happily waited for an hour in the overly crowded station which is still alright in my books having experienced the awesome system of timing that KTM has to offer over the years. When the train came it headed towards KL station at its own sweet pace and suddenly stopped after KL station for about 20 minutes. We could feel that something was wrong because the train was tilted on its side. Suddenly a train from the opposite side of the tracks brushed through and it hit the door of the train causing sparks of fire and violently jolted the train. At this point the air conditioning system stopped working and we were stranded in the middle of nowhere in a train which didn’t have air supply. After 20 minutes people were starting to suffocate (which as bad as it seems is a usual occurrence during rush hour in trains which the air cond isn’t working properly). I couldn’t stand the heat anymore and opened the emergency doors to let some air in. We were in the middle of a jungle at 7:30 pm at it was pitch dark. There was a number printed at the side of the train in which it was stated that in case of an emergency to call that number. I called the number and to my surprise it rang for abit and the line was cut of on the other side. The bastards actually cut off an emergency number!!! Even the moron that was working on the train did nothing. He just got of the train and walked of leaving all the passengers on their own without knowing what was going on. I knew that it would take ages for them to get the train going so I got out and walked in the dark all the way to the previous station.



To make matter worst, KTM has the policy of employing the stupidest specimens of human being that’s the can find. The workers do not have a policy of helping the customers and are usually chatting among each other or trying to flirt with female passengers as they pass by. At peek hours, the ticketing counters have only one person tending to it and that person is usually texting or talking on his phone. The ticketing machines that are placed there work when they feel like working and it’s the passengers who are left in the lurch.



If I had my way I would fire each and every KTM worker and sell the entire thing to the private company who can run the system efficiently like how the PUTRA is being run. GET A CLUE LA MORONS

"The CAR or the Girl" which do you choose between the both??

I was driving with a friend sometime back and he asked me a question that was highly philosophical and thought provoking. The question was "which would you choose, the car of your dreams or the hottest girl in sight??". For those of you who prefer images, which would you choose, Gisselle Bundchen or the 2008 Ferrari F430??? I don’t know why but without even blinking I said "the f430 la bro"...Well to our female followers, trust me I am not a chauvinist or even a misogynist but the logic to me seems to be clear. Well on behalf of all the boys out there, allow me to plead my case.

The girl... or the car?

My first point maybe abit unsound but we (the Autobros) propose that a car is cheaper to maintain as compared to the average girl. The car doesn’t demand anything its just happy the way it is, where else most girls albeit not all would give u a subtle hint "Baby that bag would go so well with my dress, I wish I could have it"(put together with a puppy dog face).And hence most guys would by then start digging into their wallets and bank accounts to please her at the danger of provoking her wrath. A car doesn’t, it doesn’t beg for new rims, a new interior unless YOU (the owner) decide that it needs new rims.

A car wouldn’t use you and then hang you out to dry only to return when it needs your help. Well again I know a few ladies like that. A car really doesn’t mean to break you heart where else a girl would do something with full knowledge that it would upset you but do it nonetheless and act like as if they never knew that it would hurt you.



Even if you treat a car badly the day before by going through a rough road or a high road hump, it would most probably still start faithfully the next morning without throwing a tantrum or a hissy fit like some girls do.A car doesn’t PMS every month and only has a mild disruption if you don’t properly service the car every now and then. Further a car doesn’t get jealous that you look at another car or drive another car that’s better. A car gives you pleasure every time you want it and not every time they want as compared to a girl. A car won’t make you wait for 2 hours just to get ready when you are rushing somewhere.



Well I might expect some heated comments about this but trust me it’s just the way guys feel. I am not just speaking on behalf of myself but my fellow brothers who share the same logic which I am putting forward. Trust me I have gone thru enough girls and all their "wonders" to have suffiencent experience and exposure that qualifies me to write this. So hence in my view a car is better then a girl in certain ways but not all. There are certain things that a car can’t do yet but with the marvels of technology anything is possible in the future. Take care people

Jeremy

Malaysian cars....washing machines on wheels???

I think it’s a common saying especially among Malaysians that the local car manufacturers namely Proton and Perodua are kind of bad in quality and to quote a certain individual I know "a Kancil is a washing machine on wheels”. However, the question that should be answered is whether that the whole conceptions that Malaysian made cars are badly made and are of unreliable quality.

I for one think that the question would be answered differently based on who you care to ask. If you were to ask an average teenager who doesn't know smack about cars and has to deal with the awesome public transportation system that Malaysia has to offer, he would tell u that even getting a Proton Saga is a life saver. However if you were to ask a seasoned driver or someone who has the means to be choosy with his car choices he might say a Proton or Perodua is like a bad date, after having one, you wish you never have another one again.



The thing is (in my opinion anyway), you have to look at what you want in a car. My dad has had several Protons over the years (im too broke to get a car of my own) from what I see the cars served him well. My dad travels a lot.He bought a Proton Saga special edition in 2006 and in less than 3 years the car has clocked 130,000 on the millage meter. To him the car has relatively good fuel efficiency, gets you from point A to B, and is easy to maintain. Hence to him the Proton was a pretty good buy.



The Proton Satria Gti for example is an example of a good local car. It’s also rumored to be used by the British Police force as a highway patrol car. It has a decent 130 horses and can’t hit 220km/h.It was also a decent looking car that every teenager at the time including yours truly wanted to have. The Perodua Myvi is also a relatively good car.Excellent fuel economy together with decent looks which have made it a good asset to the folks at Perodua.

Satria GTi

However there have been numerous faults with the cars for example, the power windows on a Proton will usually fail after 2 years, the infamous gear box issues with the Perdana line and OF COURSE THE PROTON JUARA....can someone tell me what were the folks at Proton thinking when the signed of on such a product???....

Proton Juara

Hence all that is said about the "uselessness" of Malaysian cars isn’t all true because every now and then they do get their gears right and come up with good cars. But the Juara????....

JEREMY VINESH

Unsung Heroes

On the Dash-Board, we leave nothing from the motoring world aside, thus we give our new collumn on "Unsung Heroes". Over here we take a look at cars that would make most of you go "Goodness who drives those things anymore??" when someone actually does. Those "things" to our eyes seem somewhat different compared to the automotive sight of a layman. I see an '85 Nissan Sunny on the road and I go "Man that's a tank! It still runs after 20 odd years!". To get from 1 point to another is what a car is all about in daily terms. These cars do just that and to top it off they come with air-conditioning for those who can't take the heat (me included), rear seats to haul 3 small rear-ends and a boot with sufficient space to store a spare person! There you go, anything else you need from your car? But... yes there always is a but isn't there? BUT, there is the question about comfort. Truth hurts because these "Unsung Heroes" can provide you with everything except (in most of cases) comfort.

      Let's look at the costs' point of view. These heroes are usually of Japanese origin which translates to reliability, reliability and yes... reliability. I bought myself a Nissan Sunny 150Y(not the usual 130Y, this comes with a 1.5 litre engine) about a year ago. Cost me RM3500 and repairs were approximately RM1000 and the car was perfect there after apart from minor clutch glitches. All in all, RM4500. Fuel economy? With one full tank of fuel which costs RM50, the car will run a fortnight before its next refill. Economic crisis? Get yourself a Sunny.

     Now the car doesn't look that great I admit it, but you cannot complain as you are paying for the car the equivalent value of fuel for a Hummer! The drive is not as bad as you think and its engine hasn't lost its horses as you might assume. Yes, old cars do have sudden tantrums at which your car would stop moving without warning (or you just stepped on the brakes instead of the one on the right). If your case isn't the latter then just get out, pop the hood and act as if you are meddling something until your mechanic arrives. Easy aint it? These oldies aren't perfect but they deserve much better than what they get. However, there are a few rules to follow if you own an old car:

1) Never intend to transport a dying person to a hospital in it as it may decide to take a nap halfway.

 2) Never intend to transport a dying person to a hospital in it as the ride may kill him.

3) Never intend to transport a dying person.....

.... well you get the picture, it all involves a dying person. Well that's why man created the ambulance for God's sake! Now to the pros:

1) You can park your car anywhere without worrying of it being stolen.

2) You don't have to worry if anyone nicked the back of your car accidentally....it wouldn't make a    difference.

3) If you lost your keys, you still can use a knife.

You see? Can you do that with your Mercedes or BMW? Every car has it's pros and cons no matter how comical they may seem. If you love cars, you just have to love them all. Drive an oldie one day for it is quite fun I guarantee that.

     That's that and we'll  bring you more stories and possibly test-drives on Unsung Heroes only here on The Dash-Board. Next time you see an old cars, remember one thing, it has lived longer serving its driver than yours ever would. As the saying goes, Old Is Gold. Cheers.

-RVD-

Why I Cant Sell My Kia For A Good Price

    I went to a car dealership once and when I asked them how much they are willing to accept my dads Kia Carens for, they said 20k.the shitty part is we bought the car for almost 100 only less then 5 years ago. Even a 15 year old Honda costs more. Well that’s the case for a Carens, the salesman said if you want to sell a Spectra "you better just keep it la boss, no point selling".

    So this begs the question why. Why does the Kia mark have such a bad resale value? Well firstly to me Kia's are not badly made like some might claim it to be. For instance the Carens is quite spacious and comfortable inside. But the engine is SCREWED UP...it takes as much petrol as a tank. And to those who need a picture, my brother and I once went to Bangsar. We poured rm 10 worth of petrol and mind you Bangsar is like 15 minutes away from my place. The petrol only lasted for about quarter the way after Bangsar. A MYVi could probably do 2 trips on rm10. So we can safely conclude that Kia's don’t have the best engine management system in terms of fuel.
    Further (well this might not be entirely Kia's fault) but other car manufacturers such as Naza have come out with models that look exactly like the Kia models for example the Naza Citra which looks entirely like the Kia Carens.However I’m not saying that there has been a classic case of as in Malaysian terms"ciplaking" due to the fact that there may have been deals made between Naza and Kia. The Naza Citra cost about 80k as compared to the Kia at almost 95k at the time. So who in the right mind would opt for the Kia when the Naza offers a better 2.0 engine and better gadgets like a DVD player compared to the sluggish 1.8 engine offered by the folks at Kia.
    I’m not against Kia in anyway but I’m just giving the review of one of the cars that Kia sells based on my own experiences with the car. And if you are saying that maybe the problems that I have highlighted only applies to the Carens, I would happily refer you to a friend who drives the Kia Spectra and who is not a happy camper and just waiting to get rid of it. So the folks at Kia may want to take note...You are doing a beautiful job with the cars but the engine is something that you have to look into.

JEREMY VINESH

The Prancing Horse

This piece is dedicated to all die-hard fans of Ferrari and avid followers of their racing division, Scuderia Ferrari.

You are stuck in traffic and your son looks out through the rear passenger window and spots a sweet Beemer. He’d probably go “Mom, look at that car!” Now let’s rewind and reset.


You are stuck in traffic and your son looks out through the rear passenger window and spots a sweet, red, road hugging coupe. He’d definitely go “MOM THAT’S A FERRARI!” Yes, there are cars and then there are Ferraris. The craze for the Prancing Horse began with the 125s racecar, built by Enzo Ferrari Himself, which was the first to be called a Ferrari and to carry the “Cavallino Rampante” or The Prancing Horse as we call it, proudly on its nose back in 1947. 63 years later, the craze has aged like fine wine and Ferrari occupies the throne in the automotive world, christened “King of All Cars”.

The “Cavallino Rampante” has a history of its own however. In 1923, Enzo Ferrari met with Countess Paolina, mother of the late Italian Air Force ace Francesco Baracca after winning a race at the Savio track in Ravenna. She asked Enzo Ferrari to use the “Prancing Horse” on his cars as it brought good luck. The original prancing horse was painted on Francesco Baracca’s airplane which perished in combat. Today, the prancing horse is one of the most distinguished emblems in the world, let alone among automotive giants.

Ferrari has come a long way since then, having the epitome of automotive technologies without losing its attributes. Speed, handling and noise… that is not all that makes up a Ferrari.

You are sitting in a Lamborghini or an Aston Martin if that is all you get my friend.

Sum it all up with flair, rich racing history and curvaceous Italian looks… you get a Ferrari.

-rvd-

Judge a car based on its intended purpose....

  As was noted by the ice breaker, we appreciate the very machine that your car truly is. I may be biased and envious but a Ferrari or an Aston Martin isn’t something that you give to your child that just had their 17th birthday who can’t park the car to save their life.
  Having said that, as some of us might have seen on a certain show a group of auto journalist slammed economical cars like the Proton Satria Neo, Perodua MYVi and such. with all due respect to those journalist, they are judging those cars based on the same standards that they would expect of a Ferrari or a Bentley and not for what those cars truly are which is a car for a man on the street and was only meant to get a person from point A to point B.


According to them the Perodua MYVi has "breaks that are rubbish and the ride is rubbish", they also complained about the plastic dashboard and lining and said that this is a car that you drive with a long face. However I drive that car quite a lot and to me it’s a pretty good car for a man on the street. The car doesn’t drink much fuel, has the gadgets that a normal person would need and is relatively comfortable. I know I am not alone when I say that the Perodua MYVi is quite a good car to own given that its price is low and IT’S ECONOMICAL which the same reason it was built for is and it caters to the economically conscious segment of society.

Hence as I said with all due respect, you can’t judge an economical car on the same standard that you would judge a luxury sedan or a super car, so perhaps the journalist may want to exercise come leniency when they judge future cars of the same category.

JEREMY VINESH

Ice-Breaker

 A trip to a stall just a minute's walk away would take ten... why? You look for your keys, lock the doors, get seated and belted, reverse, shut the gates and drive to that very stall. You get back, lock up and get inside, leaving the car out of your mind until a time for its need arises.  Here however, we leave no room for cars being taken for granted. No car that's analysed by our eyes and mind goes unappreciated or disrespected. No... we love cars here and we (AutoBros) bring you the Dash-Board, THE spot for latest automotive news, our own test-drive reviews, car comparisons, what's hot in the automotive world and of course, motorbabes. All posts will be signed off by our "professional car lovers": Jeremy, Pravin, Ravind, Yukesan. Support us as we hope to be the Malaysian versions of Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May. With that, we give you The Dash-Board!